Friendship in International Relations: Henry Kissinger and Zhou Enlai

Friendship is a common trope in international relations, but the construct’s importance at the level of the state and the individual diplomat is surprisingly little understood. This paper probes the personal relationship between Nixon’s foreign policy adviser Henry Kissinger and Chinese leaders, especially Zhou Enlai, in the first half of the 1970s. The paper is a case study of how diplomats construct friendships, why they are sometimes as significant as considerations of national interest in shaping international relations, and which emotional dynamics come into play as a result of affection and trust.

           Nixon’s opening to China in 1971-1972 was a dramatic diplomatic triumph. Kissinger played a central role in this rapprochement. On his first secret trip in 1971, he fell in love, literally, with China and its leaders. From the time of his first meetings with Zhou and Mao, Kissinger was convinced that he had finally met his soulmates, men who had the intellectual brilliance to match his own (though historian Arne Westad has shown that Mao and Zhou were not strategic geniuses but instead had a deeply misinformed view of the world balance of forces). “I cherish deep feelings for Zhou Enlai,” Kissinger said. His writings are filled with praise for Zhou’s and Mao’s skill, subtlety, and intelligence, and for the “brilliant” way Chinese leaders approached international relations. At dinner parties he stunned guests with testimonials to his “adoration” of Zhou.

           Using Kissinger’s telephone transcripts and memos, this paper probes his feelings toward Zhou and shows how deeply they influenced his thinking on key issues, at times leading Kissinger toward aggressive actions intended to impress the men whose respect he craved, as well as how those feelings helped to build trust and to diminish the dangerous hostility between the two countries.